Tuesday 18 September 2012

The Blond advises: Going for a trip without your partner

After my 2 week holiday in Thailand, I have decided to do it! I have been dreaming about it for the most of my life. A lot of my friends did it, but I was always afraid, there were always excuses: no money, work, no one to travel with... Then I moved to London and I had to make my way through different employers and jobs. I wanted the money and some stability. I got married and traveled a little bit with my husband. It was a nice enough life...And then, the Thailand happened and changed everything!

I'm not sure if it was because of the country itself, or the way we traveled, but for the first time of my life I felt free. It turned out that backpacking is the way to go and after I came back I wanted more. I went through a very hard time, months of post-holiday depression at its worst kind.

Because I'd gone to Thailand without my husband and he has never been further than Spain, he didn't understand me and, I think, he still doesn't. He doesn't like hostels, dirty toilets and long journeys on buses. He likes comfort. He's not much interested in sightseeing and experiencing different cultures. He wants to go away, but to a nice hotel, drink beer on the beach and don't care how to get from point A to point B. I, on the other hand, love the freedom that backpacking gives you, the unlimited choice and opportunities of meeting new people.

You might  think that it's a big difference in characters between us and it's true, but we also like other things that keep us together. We are friends and companions and I believe that we're going to stay together until death do us apart.
I struggled with my decision to go away for 3 months without him. I felt bad of wanting something different from him and something that would eat up quite a lot of our finances. But if I stayed and didn't go, I would be the most miserable wife on the planet and neither he nor I would want that.

We had a lot of conversations...A LOT, which really led to a conclusion: he is going skiing and I'm going backpacking :)

Adam is the most understanding and kind person I know. Ok, he's got some bad sides ( read: leaving his socks all over the place, being REALLY loud when he's had few pints and not asking for directions when he's obviously lost etc), but in general he's wonderful and all he wants for me is happiness and fulfillment.
God knows how hard it will be for me to leave him for the 3 months, but I also believe that the break will be good for us and will teach us a lot of things. Our love is strong enough.

I realise that not many women have the same attitude as me, even less have such a wonderful husband , so I won't say that everything is possible and you will be able to go without ruining your relationship - sometimes there needs to be a sacrifice, whether it's your life time dream or marriage.
Try to talk to your partner, explain to him what you want to do. Who knows, maybe you share the same passion and don't even know about it! If you can't go for 3 months, go for a month, 2 weeks, whatever - the experience will be amazing nevertheless.

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